âHey Sweetie,â Miss Mable said, as she welcomed me onto her porch. âWould you like some tea?â Mable Jenkins was known in this sleepy, sticky, southern, black community for two thingsâher sweet tea and her preternatural tendency to vote for moderate Democrats in highly contested primariesâso of course, I accepted.
âThe kids call me Miss Mableâ she continued, as she filled my mason jar with a beverage I highly suspect was chocolate Kool-Aid, âbut my friends call me WOBN.â
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âWOBN?â I followed.
âOf course, Sweetie. Short for Wise Old Black Negro.â
For the next hour, we sat on her porch and talked about the things Wise Old Black Negroes talk about: crawdads, ginger ale, diabetes, and Medgar Evers. (âWe were prom dates. Back when the colored prom was in a Woolworthâs basement.â) Every ten minutes or so, a different little black negro neighborhood girl would walk up to the porch, hug her, and then Mable would spend the next seven minutes braiding the girlâs hair. (âI used to braid Malcolmâs goateeâ Mable explained, as I wondered if he even had enough beard hair for that to be possible.)
I made the trip to South Carolina to find a Wise Old Black Negro to provide context for why so many Wise Old Black Negros are voting for Joe Biden in the Democratic primaries. All the pieces Iâve read and watched about Wise Old Black Negro voting patterns helped, but I wantedâI neededâto meet a Wise Old Black Negro myself, to verify if theyâre truly as old and wise and black and negro as theyâre considered to be. Could I have just asked some elders in my own family? Maybe, but I think itâs weird to base any systemic conclusions on what some Wise Old Black Negro who happens to be related to me happened to do.
Before I could segue into Biden, Bernie Sanders, and voting, Miss Mable got very still. Her eyes blank, her cheeks flush, her mouth agape. I thought she was having a stroke, so I rushed to her side. She immediately perked up. âOh, Iâm sorry Sweetie. Them Spirits were whisperinâ to me.â
âThem Spirits?â
âYes, Sweetie. Them Spirits. They visit every four years. Sometimes they tells me who to vote fo. Sometimes they just want some of my corn. Thatâs why I keeps this bucket right here.âÂ
Miss Mable gestured to a bucket next to her feet. I took off the lid, and it was filled with freshly steamed corn. âRosa Parks used to call me Lilâ Corn Bucket. Everyone thought it was cause I used to run them numbers, but I always just carry a bucket of corn in case Them Spirits come a visitinâ.â
While eating a delicious bowl of Miss Mableâs Porch Bucket Spirit Corn, I asked her to share her thoughts about this primary. She had many.
âBernie seems like a good man. A good, solid Jewish man, with hair like the moon and a voice like potato soup. But Mable knows white people like I knows the back of my teeth, Sweetie. And I knows none of them bleachies would vote for free doctors âcause thatâd mean weâd get âem too. I just feel like Biden knows his whites better than Bernie do. And I hate that motherfucker.â
Although confused by Miss Mableâs analogyâHow can you know the back of your own teeth?âher point made sense. Sanders, in the eyes of Spirit-Seeing, Corn-Carrying Negros like Miss Mable, couldnât win. He just wasnât the reasonable, practical, and pragmatist choiceâwhich is what The Spirits told her.
I left Miss Mableâs porch that day equipped with a better understanding of the Wise Old Black Negro vote, and seven pounds heavier from all the Kool-Aid and corn I consumed. And the next time you want to write people like Mable Jenkins off for being a low-information, fear-based voter, well, whereâs your corn bucket?
Straight From
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