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In Less Than a Week, Donald Trump Has Rick James-ed All Over America’s Couch
He’s been in office less than a week and he’s already wreaking havoc. In his first full day playing president, Donald Trump withdrew the United States from the Trans-Pacific Partnership, issued a hiring freeze on the federal workforce and took federal funding from all nongovernmental agencies that perform abortions. In subsequent days, he pushed for…
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Usain Bolt Loses Gold Medal Over Teammate’s Drug Test
I’m sure Usain Bolt is pissed right now, because a teammate is messing with his legacy. Bolt’s going to have to return his 2008 Olympic relay gold medal after Jamaican teammate Nesta Carter tested positive for a banned substance, the BBC reports. Here’s the thing: If I’m Carter, I’m pissed, too. Why is a sample…
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Your Ultimate Auntie, Rep. Maxine Waters, Takes ‘Knuck if You Buck’ Stance on Trump
Maxine Waters should be tired. At 78 years old, she shouldn’t be the congresswoman leading the fight against Donald Trump, but don’t tell her that. She’s fought bigger and tougher, and to her, this is the fight in front of her and she isn’t the running type. Serving since 1991 as the U.S. representative for…
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Trump Calls for ‘Major Investigation’ Into Nonexistent Voter Fraud
President Donald Trump doesn’t need evidence to make claims, and he also doesn’t need evidence to demand “a major investigation” into voter fraud. That’s right; Trump is going to investigate the claims that only he’s made since losing the popular vote to Hillary Clinton. “I will be asking for a major investigation into VOTER FRAUD,…
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Trump Sends Tough Tweet About Chicago Violence
The tweeter in chief is at it again, this time taking aim at Chicago. On Tuesday, President Donald Trump put Chicago on notice, tweeting: While it was unclear if the president meant the FBI, the CIA, the Drug Enforcement Administration or the National Guard, his tweet sounded really tough. My guess is that after he…
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WorldStarHipHop Founder Lee O’Denat Dead at 43
WorldStarHipHop founder Lee O’Denat, better known as “Q,” died in his sleep Monday night, according to TMZ. O’Denat, 43, reportedly died of a heart attack. O’Denat founded the site in 2005, and it quickly became popular as a YouTube-style platform of hip-hop performances, street fights and scantily clad women. It would take almost four years…
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No Evidence of Illegal Voting, but That Doesn’t Stop Trump or Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer
It’s been two days, just two days, since President Donald Trump took office, and the weird news just keeps coming. On Tuesday, Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer made it clear that real facts, aka the truth, will not be in play at this White House when he walked out to the podium and continued the myth…
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Despite Protests, Trump Revives Pipeline Projects
A day after President Donald Trump signed executive orders to freeze most federal-worker hiring, remove the United States from the Trans-Pacific Partnership and stop funding of all foreign nongovernmental agencies that perform abortions, he’s given the go-ahead for construction to continue on two controversial pipelines, the Chicago Tribune reports. In only his second day in…
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Bengals’ Adam ‘Pacman’ Jones to Police: ‘I Hope You Die’
I’m unclear as to how the Cincinnati Bengals’ Adam “Pacman” Jones still has a job. When it comes to playing football, he’s decent, but when it comes to causing trouble, he’s amazing. He’s literally world-class. Recently Jones was arrested for doing Pacman stuff (which usually means cursing someone out or spitting on someone or fighting…
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Sean Spicer Is Building a Chrisette Michele ‘Bridge’ Alternative-Facts Mixtape
The president has had a shaky start since taking office. First his inauguration drew a whopping seven people, not counting those who watched on the internet; then he bombed at the CIA office; then he sent his press secretary, Sean Spicer, out to deliver his first statement to the press with “alternative facts,” which, in…
