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An Intervention Letter for America
Dear America, I know you’re wondering why we brought you here today. First, I want you to understand that this is not an ambush. We are here because we love you. I’m sure that the somber look on everyone’s face makes you think we have bad news, but don’t worry—you’re America; there’s always bad news.…
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The Emergency Guide to Surviving the Trumpocalypse
This is a test. This is only a test. We here at the Emergency Black Broadcast System have a long history of preparing black people for national emergencies. Our first alert was issued Dec. 31, 1862, when soon-to-be-emancipated slaves huddled in churches, singing songs and anticipating freedom. Since that day, we have issued a variety…
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All Films Matter: The Birth of a Nation and the Vilification of Black Feminism
Before you read this, there are two things you should know: I paid to see The Birth of a Nation. I reviewed it. I liked it. I wish more people had seen it. I believe Nate Parker is a despicable human being. I don’t believe those two facts negate each other. Intelligent people understand that…
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For Black People, Donald Trump Is America
As Donald Trump inches closer to the Oval Office, half of America seems to be coming down with a collective case of the bubble guts at the prospect of having to endure four years of an apricot-colored buffoon in chief. One of the biggest mysteries in the minds of the global coalition of handwringers (known…
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A Complete Breakdown of White People's Fears
There is a contingent of alt-right trolls who patrol the internet, radio shows and public conversations to quickly dismiss any real-world discussion about police brutality, state violence or how society devalues the bodies of black people. Their argument is always the same: Black people commit a disproportionate amount of violence; therefore, black people make up…
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Maybe Violence Is the Answer?
Last week, officials in Tulsa, Okla., decided to charge Police Officer Betty Shelby with manslaughter in the shooting death of Terence Crutcher. Prosecutors will probably argue that the evidence in the dashcam and helicopter footage supports handing down an indictment. Activists will try to convince the public that this is a small step toward the…
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If America Treated Racism the Way It Treats Terrorism
As soon as America caught wind of the makeshift bombs that exploded in New York, New Jersey and Minnesota this weekend, New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio quickly assembled the media and held a press conference, pleading for calm while authorities investigated the incidents. Along with the usual fear and outrage came calls from…
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Maybe There Are No Good Cops?
In the wake of the police-shooting deaths of Terence Crutcher, Tyre King, Keith Lamont Scott and (insert the name of the next victim here), there will undoubtedly be quickly assembled news panels with ex-cops and former police officials regurgitating the same stale arguments. As they bombard media outlets with the usual litany of excuses meant…
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Racism Explained to ‘New Blacks’ Like They're 5 Years Old
It seems as if every other week, another black celebrity sits down in front of cameras, microphones and a cunning white interviewer with a disarming smile and nefarious means, and tries to explain to the world the delusion that he or she is living in a post-racial America where inequality and prejudice no longer exist.…
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White Advice for Black Protesters
Hello, angry black people! We, the members of the white delegation, have recently noticed an undercurrent of restlessness among the Negro population. As part of those outreach efforts, I have been dispatched here to teach the proper way to voice displeasure about the state of race relations in America before this discontent grows into a…
