• If You Paid Ja Rule $10,000 for Anything In 2017, You Deserve Whatever The Fuck Happens To You

    If You Paid Ja Rule $10,000 for Anything In 2017, You Deserve Whatever The Fuck Happens To You

    How exactly would Ja contribute to your good time at the Fyre Festival?

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  • What I’ve Learned (And What I'm Learning) A Year After My Divorce

    Seems that nearly everyone agrees that 2016 was a front-to-back wack-ass year for a lot of wack-ass reasons. For me, the year took a sharp-left shit-show turn in its very first seconds. Literally. During an otherwise wonderful New Year’s Eve wedding with my family in Detroit, my wife and I descended into the worst fight…

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  • The Best Hip-Hop Tracks of 2016

    A month or so ago, Panama suggested I listen to “We Did It,” a track from Lil’ Yachty’s Lil Boat “mixtape.” He said it was worth peeping because it might be the single worst rap song of all time. Because Panama is one of, like, three or four niggas I know with whom I can…

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  • I Dont Know How I'm Supposed To Feel About Kanye

    This piece started off quite differently. You see, after years of skating around the margins of the sentiment, I’d finally leaned into full-on “Fuck Kanye West” mode. It followed years of annoyance at his trend of constantly obnoxious and solipsistic behavior. Even his admission during a recent concert that he didn’t vote at all Nov. 8 but…

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  • What To Do When You Don't Give A Fuck About Local Sports

    My college sweetheart grew up in Cambridge, Mass., walking distance from the Boston Red Sox’s Fenway Park. Like many of her ilk, she grew up a die-hard Red Sox fan; when they lost the pennant to the New York Yankees in 2003, she flatly rejected me from entering her dorm room to witness her crying.…

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  • The Best Rap Beefs Ever

    It’s interesting—and somewhat sad—that this decade’s only two meaningful rap beefs have involved attempts to sink the same floating dead body. It started in 2015, when everyone’s favorite manila-folder-complected, suburban Torontonian, Drake, traded “bars” with the somewhat less-meaningful Philly maestro of shout raps, Meek Mill. Though Meek exposed Drizzy for employing ghostwriters—a damning accusation in the world of…

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  • Mafia III Is Probably The Blackest Video Game Ever Made

    If you’re rocking pearls, the disclaimer at the very beginning of Mafia III (PlayStation 4, Xbox One, Microsoft Windows, MacOS) might make you clutch ‘em tightly. “Mafia III takes place in a fictionalized version of the American South in 1968. We sought to create an authentic and immersive experience that captures this very turbulent time and…

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  • A Vote For Jill Stein Is A Vote In The Trash

    Cornel West recently continued down his long, winding road to breaking my heart. He returned to his recurring role as a panelist on Real Time with Bill Maher, where he was even more overbearing than usual. He battled with Barney Frank and barely let my future second wife Alex Wagner get a word in edgewise;…

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  • A Dummy's Guide To Chicago Gun Violence From Somebody Who Lives There

    I have a friend moving to Chicago this fall to start a master’s program at the University of Chicago. As she prepares to leave from her Washington, D.C.-area home, many people in her life have expressed some degree of fear for her safety following her move. As if the moment she steps out into clear…

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  • Hip-Hop’s Best Year Ever Can Almost Buy You A Drink

    It should come as no surprise to most of you that I wasn’t the most popular kid in high school. During my 1995 – 1996 freshman year, I endured an awkward post-pubescent, pre-growth-spurt phase that had me looking like the love child of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man and Associate Bob from Demolition Man. Making matters…

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