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From Living Single to Love Jones:Â How the â90s Shaped My StyleÂ
Between Bruno Mars and our new president, Cardi B, taking us back to In Living Color with their video for âFinesseâ and bingeing on Living Single after it made its way to Hulu last month, Iâm in a â90s mood. Listen, when Living Single debuted in August of â93, I knew immediately that I wanted…
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Going With the Flow: Embracing the Blood That Binds Us
In the immortal words of the late Joan Rivers: Can we talk? No one ever really tells you what a mess periods are, do they? Even before they start, no one tells you to expect clotting; or how sometimes youâll have to wash your hands three or four times to remove the crisp iron scent…
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Stay Gold! 5 Wishes for the Golden Globes Red Carpet
Itâs awards seasonâmy favorite time of the year! Some butches may look forward to the Super Bowl (Iâm personally planning to hate-watch Justin Timberlakeâs halftime show), but I look forward to awards season because: red carpets! Listen, Iâve spent most of my life watching hundreds of hours of Project Runway and awards shows, so I…
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Itâs a Different Show: Grown-ish Isnât A Different Worldâand Iâm Cool With That
This week, Grown-ish premiered on Freeform to big fanfare. Everyone is loving it. Iâm loving it. My inner queer squealed when Zoey was completely chill with her bisexual friend Nomi. I was thrilled to see bisexual visibility on the show, and hope there will be more queer visibility overallânot just for jokes or sensational provocation,…
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Finally, a Seat at the Table: Jay-Zâs âFamily Feudâ Makes a Major Statement About Who Belongs in the Family
Because of Jay-Z, this New Yearâs Eve, I found myself thinking about families and feuding. When he released 4:44 in June 2017, the reception was mixed, not because the music wasnât good or poignantâno one who understands hip-hop can deny Jayâs lyricism or his ability to catch our attention with interesting melodies. But men and…
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With Bright, Will Smith Misses an Opportunity to Launch a Real Afrofuturistic Revolution
My friends and I constantly talk about how we want a bunch of black movies across the spectrum, from romance to science fiction. White actors get all the fun and we get all the supporting (and usually dying) sidekicks. Will Smith has been serving us all those movies we crave for years. He took a…
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Stop Putting Your Life on Layaway: 5 Things You Should Say Yes to in 2018
Recently, Wifey and I went on a double date with another black lesbian couple I deeply admire. One of them is an ĂŒber-talented writer, artist and teacher, while the other is a nationally recognized food-justice consultant. After weâd been out of touch for a while, the theme of the night was about catching up and…
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Sheâs Gotta Have Her: The Great Str8-Girl Debate
It was around 1994, and I was crushing hard on L. She was fineâlike an Asian Apollonia, but just a bit thicker, with a dynamite smile and an easy laugh. She was also the sister of a guy I worked and hung out with, and I liked her immediately. Up to that point, my dating…
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To Be Real: Dressing My Way out of âButch Envyâ
In the summer of â98, I lived in Harlem. Thereâs a longer story behind how a Midwest-raised black tomboi found herself in the Big Apple, but the short version is that technically, I was homeless, so my best friend offered me a place to stay until I started undergrad that fall. For most of my…
