Because There Couldn't Possibly Be Any More Pressing Scandals in the Monarchy, Buckingham Palace Launches an Investigation Into Meghan's Alleged Bullying

At this point in world history, it really shouldn’t come as any surprise the lengths to which whiteness—as an institution and colonialist mentality—will go to prove itself right, even when it is so far beyond wrong the hypocrisy is just leaping out.

Case in point: There are well- and multiply documented allegations of sexual predation (and possibly statutory rape) against Prince Andrew, a senior royal in the British monarchy, and one who was long and openly associated with convicted sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, no less. But apparently, it’s the rumors of Meghan, Duchess of Sussex’s “bullying” of royal staff that are a bridge too far for Buckingham Palace…because that’s obviously the scandal most in need of attention, don’t you agree?

On Monday morning, CNN reported that the palace has hired an external law firm to investigate claims made by unnamed members of palace staff against Meghan in 2018. Despite these complaints being made nearly two-and-half years ago, the fact that this investigation is launching just over a week after Meghan and Harry’s bombshell interview with Oprah Winfrey is surely just a coincidence. Surely.

More from CNN:

The Palace initially said it would investigate after a British media report earlier this month cited unnamed royal aides as saying a complaint had been made against Meghan in 2018.

A spokesman for Buckingham Palace said on Monday: “Our commitment to look into the circumstances around allegations from former staff of The Duke and Duchess of Sussex is being taken forward but we will not be providing a public commentary on it.”

CNN was not told which firm would be investigating the claims. The move comes as the Palace faces a crisis over the allegations made by Prince Harry and Meghan in their explosive interview with Oprah Winfrey.

Those allegations memorably included “concerns and conversations” raised by unnamed senior royals (who are reportedly not Queen Elizabeth II) about the skin color of Harry and Meghan’s then-unborn first child, Archie, and “what that would mean.” Despite being the son of a prince, Archie was subsequently denied the title and its attendant protections. Additionally, there was Meghan’s assertion that a widely reported incident in which she allegedly insulted Kate, Duchess of Cambridge to the point of tears ahead of the former’s wedding had actually occurred in reverse. However, the inflammatory incident was never corrected for the record by the royal family, presumably because Kate’s title will one day be “Queen,” and the duchess was therefore considered expendable (or, they considered Meghan expendable in the first place, for…reasons).

Following the reinvigorated reports of bullying by the London Times just ahead of the Oprah tell-all, Meghan was reportedly “saddened,” with a Sussex spokesperson stating:

“Let’s just call this what it is—a calculated smear campaign based on misleading and harmful misinformation. We are disappointed to see this defamatory portrayal of The Duchess of Sussex given credibility by a media outlet.”

As CNN noted, Buckingham Palace’s belated yet “aggressive plan to probe the report contrasts starkly with its approach towards Meghan’s allegation of racism against a senior royal, which the family said it would keep in-house.”

CNN continued: “Critics of the Palace are also likely to point out that they have launched no such independent inquiry into the relationship between Prince Andrew and Jeffrey Epstein, the late disgraced financier and convicted pedophile.”

Yes. Yes, we are. In the sage words of The Root’s Managing Editor, Genetta Adams: “Wow. Would love to see them investigate [Prince] Andrew this hard.”

I mean, is Andrew Cuomo even being investigated this hard?

“But those allegations differ in that they relate to senior royals rather than staff, whose complaints are more likely to fall under the remit of human resources,” CNN further explains in regard to the investigation into Meghan’s conduct. “The hiring of an outside firm comes after the Palace said their ‘HR team will look into the circumstances outlined in the article.’”

This is the part where we remind you that these complaints were initially made in 2018—coincidentally, within months of the Sussexes’ marriage. It is only now, less than a month after the Sussexes made their resignation from senior royalty roles permanent and subsequently aired out the royal laundry, that there seems to be some urgency in investigating these alleged incidents.

“Members of staff involved at the time, including those who have left the Household, will be invited to participate to see if lessons can be learned,” said an earlier statement from the Palace.

You know who else has left the Household? Meghan and Harry, despite the clear and warm support by the monarchy—which, Prince William recently reminded us, is “very much not a racist family.” What lessons might be learned there?

In other news, following their own admissions of fragile mental health during the Oprah interview as well as Meghan’s ongoing legal wrangling with several British tabloids, the Sussexes opted to make donations to two worthy UK-based nonprofits via their Archewell Foundation: PressPad, a group focused on increasing diversity in media and mental health advocacy group Mind.

“Mental health problems can affect anybody, regardless of factors like age, gender, ethnic group or socioeconomic status,” Mind’s Director of Fundraising Kathleen Miles reminds us in a statement made to ITV. “We’re grateful to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex and the Archewell Foundation for this support, which will help us continue to make sure everyone with a mental health problem gets both support and respect.”