Kentucky Governor: Black Kids Playing Chess 'Not Something You Would've Thought Of' in Black Part of Town

Apparently, astounded that all black children don’t spend their time shooting hoops or exploring new avenues of committing black-on-black crime, the governor of Kentucky regurgitated a small amount of previously digested racism when he declared how surprised he was that black kids could play chess.

On Tuesday, Republican Gov. Matt Bevin visited Nativity Academy at St. Boniface, a Louisville, Ky., middle school that is 86 percent black and only 1 percent white. Before entering, Gov. Bevin recorded a brief introduction for his Twitter followers.

“I’m about to go in and meet the members of the West Louisville Chess Club,” he explained. “Not necessarily something you would’ve thought of when you think of this section of town.”

The video montage, appropriately set to Appalachian banjo riffs, shows Bevin actually standing next to the blacks and imploring teachers to “give them the chance to succeed, to pursue the American dream.”

While I could point out how Bevin doesn’t give a damn about black kids or their dreams being that he supports Donald Trump, the Tea Party, the repeal of the Affordable Care Act, lowering the minimum wage, gun-toting teachers and the Blue Lives Matter law, I’d rather focus on a more important question:

What does Matt Bevin, and other white people expect from that “part of town?”

Well, The Root has obtained an exclusive copy of an internal memo circulated by the Bevin administration listing the top 10 things Gov. Bevin expects to see when he visits black schools:

10. Dance-offs: We’ve all seen the movies. When white people go to black schools, the first person they want to meet is the liberal, white woman who took a job at an inner-city school and saved the miniature negroes from a life of gangbanging by teaching them how to channel their anger and pain into the annual statewide dance competition usually dominated by nonblack students from the Becky Y. P. Pull Ballet Academy.

9. Jordans: Everyone knows black parents spend their welfare money on sneakers and designer outfits.

8. Crips and/or Bloods: Prior to his visit, Gov. Bevin trained in mixed martial arts for weeks so he could stop little J’Quavius from being jumped into the 57th Street Piru Thug Killers on the playground during recess

7. Liberal education: The liberal media doesn’t talk about how black kids are taught to hate the police, chant “Black Lives Matter” or believe in the myth of evolution. Black schools don’t teach kids how to respect the flag or that God named the first couple Adam and Eve (not “Adam and Steve,” as progressive textbooks would have them believe).

6. Rappers: How else do you think the kids learn how to be thugs? Rap music. In Advanced Placement hip-hop, honors-level thugs learn the correct way to conjugate the word “nigga” and how to sag their pants while walking down the street, smoking Indo, sipping on gin and juice, laid back with their mind on their money and …

you catch my drift.

5. Black-on-black crime: According to white people, at least once a month, schools hold “Continue-the-Violence” pep rallies celebrating the top gangbangers and thugs. That’s why we disregard crime in the black community.

4. Violent attacks on nerds: To be fair, this myth comes from middle-class black people who want to tout their hood bonafide by explaining how they were bullied for speaking correctly or getting good grades.

White people love shit like this because it correctly explains the education gap.

3. Sex: According to a survey conducted in the minds of conservatives, 85 percent of all teen pregnancies were conceived under the bleachers in a black high school or in the bathrooms where everyone hangs out smoking Newports after pre-Algebra.

2. Fake history: Black kids don’t learn the truth about how the war of Southern aggression actually had nothing to do with slaves. It was actually about Southerners’ rights to fly Confederate flags on their pickup trucks … And the constitutional right to own, kidnap, torture, rape and lynch black people. But mostly about the flag thing.

1. Hating white people: According to the memo, black kids spend 49 percent of their classroom time learning how to hate white people. The history of slavery perpetuates hate. Math classes teach kids to believe in data on police shootings instead of Fox News. Geography teaches them to respect other cultures. U.S. history teaches them how America has oppressed every nonwhite population in this country. Science teaches them that white supremacy has no basis in fact.

All of this leads to reverse racism, or what some educators refer to as “the truth.”

When challenged to a game of chess, Matt Bevin did not refer to the complicated game as “checkers for liberals.” Instead, Bevin left Louisville and went to visit Kentucky’s hacky-sack state championship team in one of Louisville’s white suburbs.

To be fair, I don’t know if that’s true.

It’s just something I “would have thought of” in that part of town.