congress
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Congressman John Lewis Hospitalized, Expected To Be Released Today
Civil rights icon and U.S. Congressman John Lewis was hospitalized Saturday after falling ill on a flight to Atlanta, CNN reports. Lewis’ spokeswoman, Brenda Jones, said that the congressman is under routine observation and is expected to be released today. She did not provide details about his illness or where he is being hospitalized. Since…
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In 1 Press Conference, Kirstjen Nielsen Just Beat Out Sarah Sanders for Most Hated Person in Trump’s White House
President Mein Führer von SpankDat is excluded from the “most hated in the White House” game because he would win every time. Before Monday’s press conference with Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen on the youth internment camps—which used to be big-box department stores or warehouses before becoming makeshift youth prisons—Sarah Huckabee Sanders, aka…
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Ilhan Omar, a Somali American, Seeks Seat in Congress
Ilhan Omar is a Somali-American politician who escaped from Somalia as a child, grew up in a Kenyan refugee camp and later immigrated to Minnesota. Years after immigrating, she became the nation’s first and only Somali-American lawmaker when she won a seat in the Minnesota House of Representatives. Now she is ready to become the…
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Video Evidence Proves That Betsy DeVos Might Be the Dumbest Person in Trump’s Cabinet
If the fate of the world rested on Education Secretary Betsy DeVos’ ability to answer a question about anything from elementary-level math to what she ate for breakfast, I’d pray only that we all got at least five phone calls to tell our loved ones goodbye. If DeVos were in a mental-math Olympics against a…
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This Is America: Save a White Drug Addict, Jail a Black One
Much has been said of the government responses to the opioid epidemic—specifically that it is leniently and sympathetically called an epidemic (I agree with that assessment), with sights set on healing and treatment. While necessary to combat the issue, the sympathy with which our nation views the current drug scourge is, frankly, frustrating. Why frustrating?…
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Diamond and Silk Broke About a Million Laws Thursday in Congress, and They Might Need a Lawyer
Do you know how hard it is, in a week of Kanye and Candace and Ben and Bill, to still win the Most Embarrassing Negro of the Week Award? That takes a special kind of dedication. A commitment to such a grotesque caricature of blackness that even Michael Rapaport would let time expire before picking…
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Compton, Calif., Mayor Aja Brown May Run for Congress Because Someone Has to Stop Stacey Dash
Compton, Calif., Mayor Aja Brown is considering throwing her hat into the congressional ring after black apologist and overall deplorable Stacey Dash announced that she would be running for office. According to TMZ, the wildly popular Brown wasn’t considering a run for Congress until word began surfacing that the Clueless star was going to run…
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Trump Claims Republicans Are Afraid of the NRA; Too Bad He Will Forget This Ever Happened in 3, 2 …
President Donald Trump is batshit crazy, and one of the good things about being batshit crazy is that you don’t have any loyalty to anyone—therefore, anybody can get it. On Wednesday during a televised meeting with lawmakers at the White House, Trump came out swinging against his own “party” (I use the word loosely because…
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I’m De Captain Now! Republicans Hold 9,000,000 Kids Hostage With Likely Government Shutdown
Saturday is the one-year anniversary of President Donald Trump’s inauguration, and you must admit that he’s managed a pretty radical transformation of America. He’s turned his White House into the location of a horrible reality show. He’s turned Twitter into a weapon of mass destruction. He’s made the United States the most hated country on…