jeff sessions
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The Small Man in the White House Moves to End DACA
Several news reports indicate that Donald Trump and his senior advisers met Sunday afternoon to discuss dismantling a federal program that allows undocumented immigrants who arrived in the country as children to legally work, destroying yet another one of former President Barack Obama’s signature actions, and dabbing to Trump’s racist base. Ending the Deferred Action…
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Mad Magazine Remixes a Norman Rockwell Painting for the Age of Trump
In 1958, one of America’s most renowned painters, Norman Rockwell, created The Runaway, an oil on canvas that shows a nice policeman at a soda fountain counter lovingly giving what we’re sure are great words of advice to a scruffy white kid who is an obvious runaway because of that cute little stick and handkerchief…
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Here’s Why Jeff Sessions Federal Investigation Into Charlottesville, Va.’s White Supremacy Rally Is Bullshit
Who are we kidding? Attorney General Jeff “King Keebler” Sessions’ federal investigation into the torch-wielding white supremacist march on Charlottesville, Va., is going to be an inconclusive waste of resources and efforts. In fact, when I first learned that Sessions was going to open an investigation, I joked that he was probably going to research…
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Civil Asset Forfeiture Seems to Target Poor Black and Brown People. Why Is That?
We’ve discussed civil asset forfeiture before. This is the practice that allows law enforcement to take your cash, cars, home and any other property away from you if you are suspected of a crime. No conviction is necessary, and you don’t even have to be a drug dealer to be a target. Last month, U.S.…
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Everything White People Think About Affirmative Action Is Wrong
After uniting with Steve Bannon, Stephen Miller and Betsy DeVos to form the Trump administration’s version of the Caucasian Avengers, Jeff Sessions has directed his efforts toward uplifting a class of people who have long been ignored by the American educational system: white people. According to documents obtained by the New York Times, the attorney…
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Jeff ‘King Keebler’ Sessions Wants to Get Tough on Leaks Now That the President Hates Him
Attorney General Jeff “King Keebler” Sessions announced Friday that he’s going to assist in the this Milli Vanilli-ass administration’s attempts to stop leaks from the Justice Department and intelligence community to the media. “I have this message for our friends in the intelligence community. The Department of Justice is open for business and I have,…
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‘We Are Not Thugs’: Black Police Chiefs Respond to Trump’s Endorsement of Police Brutality
Not all police officers are here for President Donald Trump’s casual endorsement of police brutality when he encouraged officers to be rough with suspects in a speech Friday to officers on Long Island, N.Y. Days after Trump’s controversial comments (when aren’t they ever controversial?), leaders of a leading black policing group met with Attorney General…
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Will New Chief of Staff John Kelly Be the Next Contestant Fired on White House Apprentice?
Previously on White House Apprentice, Anthony Scaramucci’s storyline was getting all the headlines and camera time. In the weird Big Brother-Survivor-Apprentice interpolation that is Donald Trump’s administration, there is only room for one star in front of the camera—your megalomaniac president—so Scaramucci Mane was kicked out of the house. Although Attorney General Jeff Sessions has…
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The Black Person’s Guide to Marijuana
On Monday a group of plaintiffs that includes former New York Jets tight end Marvin Washington filed suit against Attorney General Jeff Sessions about marijuana. No, Sessions didn’t smoke anyone’s stash (although he might need to take a couple of hits after Donald Trump fires him in the next few minutes). The suit challenges the…
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Trump Is a Passive-Aggressive Lover Who Needs to End It With Jeff Sessions
Because the president handles his relationships like a Twitter-obsessed teen, the American public has been privy to the nightmare reality show that is the White House, and, it looks like Attorney General Jeff Sessions has upset the emperor. On Tuesday morning, President “Da Fuq Is Wrong With This Man?” tweeted: I guess the president doesn’t…