Donald Trump set aside some time between racist rants to go on a racist rant with young black conservatives gathered at the White House to listen to the president give a rambling speech that hailed Kanye West, praised Jim Brown, gave a shout out to black people getting out of prison and asked the crowd of black supporters if any of them were “the bad ones.”
Suggested Reading
On Friday, the White House hosted attendees from Turning Point USA’s Young Black Leadership Summit, a conference hosted by the right-wing organization featuring some of Trump’s staunchest black supporters including the NRA’s Colion Noir; negro Ann Coulter impersonator Candace Owens; and the star and personification of Clueless, Stacey Dash.
After the line-dance portion of the event where Trump’s MAGA-Blacks got the chance to choose between shucking or jiving, a group of selected participants got the opportunity to listen to their friend’s grandpa who totally isn’t racist (he’s just “set in his ways”) list some of his best black friends. In an erratic speech that made the president sound like Archie Bunker high on cocaine, Trump touched on a variety of nonsensical subjects including:
Ben Carson is unqualified: The president proved his non-racist bona fides by actually touching Ben Carson in front of the adoring crowd and telling the audience that he knew Ben Carson didn’t know anything about housing or urban development but Trump gave him the job anyway.
Kanye West is the most powerful man in politics: Trump claims his black approval rating went up 26 points after meeting with Kanye West. I don’t know where he learned mathematics (his approval rating with African Americans is around 10 percent), but I sincerely hope he shows up at the Jenkins’ family barbecue thinking that Yeezy’s invitation to the cookout is valid.
Jim Brown stands for the national anthem: There was an extended rant about how fast Jim Brown could run, how athletic he was and how much he loves the flag. Then Trump just moved on. That was weird.
Call him Martin Hitler King, Jr.: He explained how his policies stopped black unemployment, black-on-black-crime and helped blacks who were getting out of prison find jobs.
The “good ones” vs. the “bad ones”: After talking about prisoners, the president acknowledged that not all ex-convicts were good people, and asked the crowd: “And I don’t mean everyone because there’s no – even in this room we probably have a couple of bad ones, right? What do you think? Are there any bad ones?”
Why “America First” is not racist: “Racist? Racist? Why is that racist?” Trump asked with a racist grin, rolling the final r, then adding: “Here we are, I think, does everyone in this room agree? You’re living in America. America first, right?”
The assemblage of MAGroes ate up every word, breaking out into chants of “USA! USA!” and “Build that wall!” to the president’s delight.
Meanwhile, watching from a small flat-screen television in the multimedia room in heaven, Martin Luther King Jr., Harriet Tubman, Donda West and Jesus simultaneously wept.
Straight From 
Sign up for our free daily newsletter.